Sorry it has been so long since i have written. Life here has been busy and yet idealic. We get up every morning and take husband to work and drop off J at school, then we do the reverse pickup in the evening. It breaks up the day, gets us out of the house and keeps me sane. Im also hoping that it will make getting going in the morning when I have to go back to work next week a little easier. We have all been cherishing baby Z and settling into life with a newborn.
So, I had a realization yesterday morning. Yesterday was exactly one year from my D&C for the miscarriage. Oh what can happen in a year! A day of such sadness and loss, only 365 days later, I was driving to the clinic across the street from the surgery center for my postpartum check up with our gorgeous baby boy. Our 1st born has turned into a wonderful big brother. Our family is complete. I am at peace. I am energized. I am happy.
Do not get me wrong friends, our struggle and pain to get to this point are still completely in my awareness. I do not take our journey lightly. I am actually still trying to fathom the reason for it. Though I have always known that all things happen for a reason, the miscarriage truly tested me. As you know, I kind of just gave it all up to "whatever" after the miscarriage and He saw us through. I believe in it more than ever now, He has a plan, we may never know the how or the why but there is a plan. Sorry, I didn't mean to get all religious on you, thats just what happened.
On a lighter note, can you believe its been 6 weeks? Z was 6 weeks old yesterday and I had my follow up with my fabulous OB. She was sweet as always. Z was sleeping in his carrier and she just gazed at him for awhile and said over and over how happy she was for us. I had taken her a photo birth announcement and a heartfelt thank you note and she gave me a hug and told me it was a pleasure to walk with us on the journey to Z. God I love her.
Yes, you did read that correctly up above, I am headed back to work already next week. I work for a small business so 12 weeks off was not possible,and lets be honest, I need to earn some money. Technically I should be there today, but my boss is on vacation today and Monday and told me not to come in until next Tuesday. Um...two more days?? OK!!! This worked out soo well as I get to chaperon a field trip for J on Monday morning and let the babysitter and Z get to know each other for a partial day. J has been begging for me to go on a field trip and I am loathe to use precious vacation days (I only get 10) on a field trip. I would rather save them for family events. So he is happy and so am I. I then plan on half days of work on Tuesday and Wednesday and diving in full time on Thursday. Let the relationship with the pump begin! A post on this to follow I am sure.
I must go now. Z will only sleep for a tiny bit longer and I need to change the wash load in the basement before he wakes up. Have a great weekend.
So happy for you (well, except for the early return to work!). My D&C is scheduled for Monday afternoon - reading this has given me such hope. Thank you, thank you for posting.
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