Too fast

Hello Friends.

Well this summer is just a whirlwind - it's going by waaaay too fast. How in the heck did it become August?  I promised pictures a few weeks ago but I swear it was just the other day!  I will not post this with out pictures, I promise!

Since that post we went to a cabin in central Wisconsin with some very good friends.  I'm not sure I would take a mobile 6 month old to a tiny cabin with 4 adults and 3 other children again but we did.   When we planned it, we thought he would be much more stationary.  How mobile can he be at 6 months right? Not so much -he was everywhere!  Next year he will be 18 months old and very mobile but I am prepared for that and it seems much more manageable   

Husband got pretty sick while we were there.  Threw up a few times and had some pretty serious tummy trouble.  8 bodies, 2 bedrooms and 1 tiny bathroom  He was miserable, and if it hadn't been almost a 6 hour drive (due to several stops to let out a complaining Z) we would have gone home.  By staying at least he could be in a bed an only have to pray that no one was in the bathroom when he needed it.  Baby Z got a bit spoiled in that I couldn't really let him cry it out in such close quarters and with a sick daddy.  So every time he cried I picked him up.  Two of the mornings I took him outside in an effort to let everyone else sleep.  This pic was taken at 6 am, we had already been up since 5 and gone outside due to Z discovering how to screech!  

The rest of us had a great time! Swimming in the lake, taking out the paddle boat a few times (I am seriously out of shape - that totally kicked my a$$!).  Here is a nice pic of all the kids in the lake.  My bestie E is right nearby and the curly headed girl in purple is my god-daughter.  (Z is E's god-son. We are a tight bunch.)

Someone gave us a Dome Away from Home thing for Z, I dont think they make them anymore but was it nice.  It was a gorgeous breezy day so I put Z in it near the lake and 30 min later I saw this......

What a life, I totally would have sacked out like that if there was one in my size!

On Saturday, Husband rallied in order to coach me through prepping the ribs for a long 6 hour smoke (OMG were they good!) and to get J set up to fish.  J had practiced his casting all day Friday while daddy was sick so was pretty good by the time he actually got a worm and a hook on the line.   Didn't take long before he caught his first fish all by himself.  This was the first year that Husband wasn't right there helping.  Look at that smile (and the tiny fish)!

So I have mentioned how Baby Z is in a hurry to grow up.  Why, oh why wont he slow down.  Well.  When we got home from the cabin, I needed him to take a nap so I put him in his crib to cry it out a bit, remember he got a bit spoiled.  Well, all of a sudden his cry changed and was he mad!  I could tell he wouldn't settle down on his own so went into is room and this is what I see.

There he was standing in his crib, holding on for dear life and screaming bloody murder!  He looks like he is smiling but he is PISSED! Needless to say the pretty bumper and the mobile have come out of the crib.  He can step up on the bumper and can now reach and pull on the mobile.  My baby's room doesn't look so much like a nursery any more.....this is happening way too fast!

That was one week ago.  Now his mission in life is to stand up wherever he can.  And once he gets to standing, he has started to practice letting go with one hand.  Where did my little baby go?  At only 15 lbs, he is still little, he is just very mobile and not so interested in snuggling anymore.  Booooo.

Which leads to my last thoughts.  We have obviously started to be done with some of the baby stuff.  The bouncy seat, the swing, the baby bathtub....   So Husband says we should have a sale.  Logically this makes sense, clear some space, earn back a little $, but something in me just wont say yes.  On one hand, we always planned on just two kids, our house is not big enough for another (although the family we bought it from had 4 kids - there is only 1 bathroom!!!!), and our budget is certainly not big enough for another.  And yet, just like with the birth control.....I cant seem to bring myself to be done. Is it the struggle to have Z and not being willing to cut off the ability?  Is it unwillingness to accept that that chapter of my life is coming to a close?  Do I really want a 3rd baby?  Can my body take another pregnancy at 38ish? Sigh, baby Z being on such a fast track has made me long to keep him small.  

So I hang on to every moment and try to figure out my head.  J will start 1st grade in September...yikes.  He to is getting big fast.  Right now he is enjoying 2 overnights with his Grammy in IL along with his 5 older cousins.  They have many fun adventures planned.  When did he get old enough for that?  He didn't even call to say goodnight.....I might call tonight, I miss him.


Enjoy the rest of summer friends, stay safe, wear your sunscreen and good luck on any journey you are on.